Cosmic Awesome: New to the Blog. Old to the universe.

Hello ladies and gentleman. I guess i should begin by telling you a little about myself.  My name is Cosmic Awesome. A moniker I’ve used proudly for many many years. I’m known in various corners of the internet under the same title, and perhaps some places I’m not aware of as my title was popular enough for some people to steal it during High School.

I know who you are. I know where you are. I will find you.

I recently came into this wonderful opportunity by winning a contest for empty blog spots. I myself tried my hand in the video game area, and sure enough here I am. Needless to say that I enjoy video games very much and have been playing them for as long as i can remember. But only one flavor of ice cream in a mans life is rather dull. I also enjoy many other things. Such as Reading comic books, Watching a good round of anime, the odd table top RPG to add some spice to my casserole of enjoyment. But who is the man behind all of these wonderful and interesting (dare i say arousing?) things that make me so awesome in the first place?

Better sit down for this one.

The person behind all the wonderful interests is none other than a 21 year old man that birthed and refined his skills of writing during his school yard days of writing for the school paper. I mainly wrote the  happenings of school activities and events. But i also managed to squeeze a video game review here and there for the sheer enjoyment of it. There are oh so many things that i could tell you about myself, my allergic reaction to almonds, my nose that bleeds like a leaky faucet or my love for sun chips. But instead I’ll just tell you other less interesting things.

You'll just have to deal with it.

Some of my favorite games include, Resident Evil, Mass Effect, Parasite Eve 1 & 2, The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time and Star Wars: Knight of The old Republic, Dragon Age: Origins and just about any Metal Gear Solid game i can get my filthy hands on. All in all you could say that I’m just some ordinary guy sitting on the couch listening to William Shatner covers that has his own comic book (well, a cover). I’ll end it all by saying this. I love you all.

Thought i was lying didn't you?

“If at first you don’t succeed…

…try the same strategy over and over until you get ridiculously lucky.”
- world’s most common tactic for any difficult boss fight.

Hello, and welcome to the posts of Zen Thrashing, the most badass lactose intolerant writer on this blog! I cover the games that are subject to the most bias. This applies to those which often are put in a negative light, like casual games or sequels, as well as those held in an undeservedly high regard, like classics. I try to see through it all to find out what truly delivers the best gaming experience. My partner in crime Cool70sFreak will be analyzing retros by my side, but expect me to use them as a mode of comparison. I love to rant, and prefer to do so with supporting evidence so the prosecutor will shut his damn mouth.

You wanna know more about me, or are you just reading for the sake of reading? Either way, the most important thing about me as a gamer is that I am an avid follower of the Third Way – I play video games like a man. We’re a pretty underground group, you’ve probably never heard of us. The Third Way in a nutshell is a middle ground between casual and competitive gaming. The first way usually only looks to get a brief moment of entertainment, and invests little effort into learning the game. The second way obsesses over perfecting techniques, exploiting every bit of the game’s programming and sacrificing enjoyment for mastery. Followers of the Third Way seek to find the ultimate balance to maximize fun and minimize stupidity.

Example:
In StarCraft 2: Wings of Liberty, casual gamers will haphazardly make Marines and send them to shoot the opponent. Ineffective, but who cares? Hardcore gamers will use cheap strategies like 6 pool Zergling rushes, 4 gate Stalker swarms, or cloaked, unhittable Banshees blowing you up before you can counter. They’ll win, but it isn’t fun for anyone and doesn’t feel like a true victory. Manly gamers will build giant Tanks, Thors and Battlecruisers to go on a massive rampage of blowing up everything in sight because it’s fun to watch.

tl;dr version: When playing video games, I put manliness before victory, fun before success.

Game-making companies don’t make products for people to purchase then throw away after a few minutes, nor to spend hundreds of hours abusing tiny programming bugs. They make games for customers to enjoy. That’s my gaming policy. My rants will highlight the overall feel of games, but I’ll be sure to include the normally unnoticed aspects of video games that enhance the experience that don’t get the respect they deserve. (Music, art, character design, story, aesthetics, mechanics, etc.)

So yeah, that’s it. Cool? Cool. Know what else is cool? THIS PLACE:

http://theotaku2.50.forumer.com/

I am a wild JoaTMoN!

Hello there, the ever clicking internet gaming demographic audience that you have fallen under. Yes, you. You’re one of many. You might as well be the Borg. It’s chemical, all gamers think the same and are the same. You got here to hear about games and that’s what you are going to get, just like everyone else that comes here. That’s right, you’re not special. Well you might be, but not in that way. Not in the right way. Or wrong way. You know what I mean.

But I deviate.

If you read the Animu side of this blagging monster, you’ll know that I live on the internet and am called Sadistic Plebian. Pleb for short. I’m also an Admin on the Blagging monsters parent forum, called Arc, feel free to PM me and get bitched at for filling my inbox with crap.

I am a creature built upon gaming. From the gentle age of 4, I started out with Monkey Island 2: LeChucks Revenge and a simplistic Simpsons Arcade game on the Amiga Commodore 64, soon taking on the likes of Resident Evil on the Playstation at age 6 and Half Life for the PC at age 9 (I have a photo album, it‘s a treat), thanks to some lousy parenting, but love my dad for it all the same.

I’m a vocal (TL Note: Vocal means Dick) person when it comes to gaming, having near 16 years of my life populated with it. Due to my upbringing, I’m a jack of all trades gamer, picking up whatever flies my whim and foppery. This means, I’ve picked up some treasures, as well as some damn stinkers.

You fortunate muffins can choose to read my ramblings on the subject or not, I can’t promise you it’ll be interesting, I don’t fuckin’ know, but I’m putting myself out there like a thousand other non-professional know-it-alls on the internet, I’m sure I’ll be better than half of ‘em.

I’m done, see you when I write something worth showing you internet.

Now entering the land of the hipster gamer

Connoisseur of indie games and ponies, whether they be of the missile variety or not, I strive to seek depth and meaning within this little medium that could. A simple college student with a penchant for the stuff that just happens to be a little less mainstream, I am.

However, let’s let this long-winded rambling end and begin with a new long-winded rambling begin. I was practically born with a bloody controller in my hand. I played the classics, your Pac Lobster and your Paperboy and your Tetris and whatnot before finally moving up to the wonderful 16bit world that was Donkey Kong and, as a result, avoiding the basis that the standard for jumping physics is the floaty one that Mario brings. If you didn’t like that opinion, then you might not like me but hey, I’m an opinionated guy.

These days I keep an ear in both the hardcore and indie crowd and pick up on anything noteworthy. I have no 360 or PS3 and I am pretty happy with it as there isn’t much the next generation has offered that makes me need to sink my teeth into other than Portal and Oblivion and I don’t mind waiting a few years for those two games.

And because I don’t get paid if I don’t give out plugs…I’m a reviewer for the forum The Otaku 2.0.  Here is the link: http://theotaku2.50.forumer.com/

Now if you excuse me I need to remember how tightly I can close my eyes.

Cool70sfreak: Gamer Extraordinaire

Hang on a minute, let me put on my stern-looking fake glasses…there we go. I grew up the games. The first game I ever played was Super Mario Bros./Duck Hunt. And I have played every single SNES and Playstation 1 and Playstation 2 game I could get my hands on since. So that doesn’t include all of them, obviously, but everything I could play, which entails a lot.

So consequently, you can expect me to be a retro critic. You know, the whole “This is horrible/fantastic (usually the former) compared to something older than it” bit. Though don’t expect me to be all whiny about it like others. I may rant, but I won’t endlessly whine. I look at everything by comparing aspects of them.

…eh, I’m done with that all. Let me toss off the fake glasses and put on my sunglasses…So anyways, that’s not to say that aren’t modern games that totally rock. Because there are. Like Left 4 Dead, both 1 and 2, which I play regularly, and I love TF2. I’m almost addicted to all three of these games. Hell, I want Portal 2 badly. Yeah, I’m a big Steam game player…on my PC (no 360 or PS3, people) Anyways, there are…also ones that totally suck *coughFinalFantasy13cough*.

So, anyways if I find a game that absolutely rocks, or just suck so much that I have to mention them, I’ll bring them up and just say what I like or hate about it. But you can more commonly expect old vs. new comparisons from me. Because there’s not a whole lot in the modern mainstream crowd that appeals to me much besides some Valve/Steam games.

Oh yeah, by the way, insert shameless plugging here: theotaku2.50.forumer.com joinitjoinitjoinitjoinitorSinistarwillfeedonyourblood, coward,runrunrun,RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWR.

That is all.